I'm Fine
by 1RedGuitar
Summary: Aaron Hotchner is stoic and guarded. What happens when he becomes vulnerable in a very public place? This is a Sickfic and not much else.
1. Chapter 1

The team wrapped up the case in an unusually neat bow. They caught the killer with a simple Garcia designed trap. An Internet chat, turned into real life meet-up and ambush by the BAU. Morgan was blindsided by the shear mass of the guy and as he grappled to get the upper hand, the unsub landed a solid blow to Hotch's solar plexus.

Once the fiend was subdued and in handcuffs, the team took stock of the situation. Hotch lay groaning on the floor, Morgan was mopping up a freely bleeding nose and JJ looked triumphant at having the pleasure to handcuff the criminal. Prentiss advised Morgan, "don't lean back with a bloody nose," she scolded. "You'll find yourself throwing up all that blood. Instead, lean forward and apply pressure." Morgan looked annoyed, but rolled his eyes as he leaned forward. Paramedics began to arrive.

Rossi was checking on Hotch, who was still motionless on the ground. "Aaron, are you ok?" He leaned over his friend.

Aaron put a hand on his belly and one on Rossi and he tried to find his breath. After gasping several times, he managed a typically brief response, "I'm fine."

"Sure, you say that, Aaron, but your color is terrible." Rossi motioned to the medics, "Abdominal trauma, check him thoroughly." The medics swarmed him. Rossi frowned and observed the scene.

The BAU convened in the hotel lobby.

"I can't believe we've got the ok to fly home tonight!" Prentiss mentioned to Morgan. They sat chatting on a couch in the comfortable, yet sterile room.

"You said it," Morgan replied, "I was hoping to get home to watch the game on a big screen."

They watched as each member of the team trickled in with bags. JJ came chatting with her hubs on her cell phone. She had picked up a bag of sandwiches for the team. Rossi has snagged a newspaper and was beginning to leaf through it. Reid had his ever present bag of books. Hotch came in looking unusually pale and haggard. Prentiss shot Morgan a look as they both watched Hotch gingerly place his bag on the ground.

"Is he ok?" She whispered, turning her face away from Hotch so he couldn't see her concern.

"I don't know. The medics released him, I wonder if he's hurting worse than he let on so we could go home sooner." Morgan rubbed his goatee.

Aaron couldn't wait to get his team on that plane and back home. He felt like sleeping for 16 hours straight. He found himself swaying slightly, so he found an armchair and sat as they waited for the jet to be ready.

Aaron watched his team board the airplane. He felt so proud of them. Morgan was in front of him. "How's the nose, Morgan?"

"Hurts like hell, but I have some ibuprofen. Once I get ahold of one of those sandwiches, I'm going to take a couple." He turned to Aaron, "how're you doing? That unsub really clocked you!"

"I'm fine. Sore, but fine. No broken ribs at least." Aaron winced as he hefted his bag into the overhead compartment.

"Let me help you with that, boss."

"I've got it, thanks."

The team settled in as the jet took off. JJ passed the sandwiches around. Aaron pulled out the case folders from his briefcase. He started filling out the appropriate forms and final report for the commissioner. Mostly, he was trying not to notice the nagging symptoms from the fight. He wanted to get home as soon as possible and downplayed his pain and tenderness. His side was throbbing where the unsub kicked him. He felt a little nauseated and was trying to ignore the paper wrapped sandwich that JJ had dropped on his table. He moved it to his briefcase. Rossi sat across from him, "Not hungry?"

"No." Aaron gave him his best neutral gaze. "I'll eat it later. "

Rossi returned the neutral stare and pressed him. "How are you doing, Aaron?"

Aaron wanted to say, good, or I'm fine, but a sharp stab of pain caused him to double over onto the desk. He pressed his forearm into his side and quietly gasped, "Ohh."

Dave got up and sat in the empty seat next to Hotch. "What's going on?" He pressed his friend.

Aaron continued to lean forward, "Oh, I'm ok. Muscle cramp, probably."

The team was so used to Hotch being the old reliable anchor. They immediately noticed the sudden commotion. Morgan sat forward, ready to jump in. The rest waited to see what would happen.

Rossi peered at him closely, "Aaron, you're pale and sweaty. And having pain. I haven't ever seen you turn down a sandwich at the end of a 14 hour day. "

Hotch seemed to gather his strength for a minute. He was truly starting to feel unwell, but it was such a public place, the BAU jet. He waited until the last possible moment before answering with a strangled, "Dave, I need help getting up."

Rossi moved swiftly. Aaron looked pale and was breathing shallowly. Dave slipped the papers to the floor and folded the table down. Aaron stood shakily, still gripping his side. "Bathroom." He murmured, nearly tripping over Dave as he staggered to the aisle. Reid was just leaving the bathroom, as Hotch pushed past him to the lavatory. The door banged open and Reid could hear the sound of his boss gagging forcefully. Rossi was on Hotch's heels and stopped next to Reid as he heard Hotch throwing up. "What's going on?" Reid asked.

"I'm not sure yet, kid." Rossi poked his head into the tiny bathroom.

Aaron was heaving into the tiny airplane toilet. He felt suddenly ashamed and graceless, knowing that everyone was listening. His stomach finally stopped spasming after several long minutes. He looked up as he wiped his mouth on a tissue and caught Rossi's concerned gaze. "I'll be out in a minute. I'm ok." He tried to sound firm and reassuring.

Dave took a step back, "ok, but I'm right here and will come back in if you're not out soon."

Aaron pulled himself out of a crouch and held onto the sink. He rinsed his mouth with water and wondered what was going on. His side was throbbing painfully. The vomiting seemed to have passed. He wiped his face one more time with a towel and grabbed an air sick bag just in case. He pushed the door open and was greeted with a very concerned Rossi.

"I think I need to lie down," Aaron whispered to Rossi. He was starting to feel dizzy and lightheaded again.

Rossi nodded, gripping his arm as he led him to the couch. "Go get a blanket," Rossi pointed Reid to the closet.

Aaron sat carefully on the sofa with Rossi's help. JJ crouched in front of Aaron, speaking softly. "I brought you some water and here's a ginger ale. Do you want to try one of them?"

He swallowed thickly, took a deep breath and reached for the can of ginger ale. Sitting felt ok. He took a few long sips of the soda, trying not to drain the entire can at once. He briefly thought about how much he disliked this helpless position.

"Go easy, Aaron." JJ patted his arm. "Too much at once is going to come back on you..." She rose and went to stand with Spencer in the aisle.

Rossi took the can from him and put it on the table next to the couch. Hotch accepted the blanket from him with a nod and lay down. He could hear them whispering about him, but found he had little energy to care or be embarrassed. It felt good to lie down, but he had the nagging suspicion that he wasn't finished being sick. The soda weighed heavily in his stomach. The nausea continued to build until he couldn't ignore it any longer. When his stomach started cramping, he sat abruptly and shakily continued back to the bathroom. Another sharp swell of pain brought tears to his eyes. He moaned and crumpled to his knees. Reid was closest and kept him from falling to the ground.

"Reid," Hotch gasped, "help me to the bathroom, and hand me one of those bags."

Spencer hustled him into the tiny bathroom and grabbed a bag. Hotch grappled with his pants. He looked pleadingly at Spencer, "Give me a minute."

Reid closed the door, "Oh man, he has it bad." He frowned at JJ and Rossi. "How long until we land?"

JJ looked at her phone, "It'll be another two hours at least. Do you think he needs to go to the hospital?"

"I don't know. I'll see if I can catalogue his symptoms when he comes out. So far it seems like food poisoning or the flu, but he took that blow to the gut a few hours ago." Reid looked to Rossi.

"JJ, why don't you go sit. Reid and I can help Hotch when he's ready. I want Dr. Reid to help figure out whether we need to divert the flight and find a closer hospital." She nodded and went back with the rest of the team. Filling them in took very little time since she didn't know much.

In the bathroom, Aaron spent an agonizing 10 minutes retching into a paper bag while his bowels emptied. This was not the best time for the flu. Was there ever a good time? Although he was beginning to have doubts about whether it was the flu. His belly pain was increasing.

Rossi poked his head in, "Hotch, I know you're feeling pretty miserable. Do you need help?"

Hotch groaned, "I need a little more time."

Rossi and Spencer waited on the couch. Morgan approached them.

"We should make an emergency stop, guys. I have never seen him like this before. I'm getting worried." Morgan rubbed the back of his head.

"I'm worried too, Morgan." Rossi looked up to see Hotch in the hallway looking green and miserable. He jumped up and gently took his arm.

"Are you ok, Aaron?" Rossi asked, watching his friend carefully.

"I'm fine." He glanced at Dave, "ok, not great at the moment." Hotch moaned as he lay down on the couch.

Rossi knelt down next to the couch, "Aaron, can you tell Spence what your symptoms are? I think you need another medical evaluation and he is the closest we have to a doctor. "

Reid changed positions with Rossi. "So, Hotch, you've been sick?" He swallowed uncomfortably as he realized the awkwardness of the exchange.

Hotch nodded, "I think I'll be ok, just get me home. I'll rest at home. "

"Hotch, the sudden onset of your illness has everyone a little worried. Humor us so we can be a little more certain you don't have something more serious going on." Rossi stood in the doorway looking stern.

Aaron sighed. He was starting to feel chills. He shifted so he could sit up a bit. The movement caused more stabbing pains in his side. As the pain washed over him, he felt the bile in his throat rise again. He tried to get up, but Reid could see what was happening. He thrust a bag in front of Hotch, who had no choice but to use it. He spat bile and mucous. His body trembled and sweated as the vomiting continued. When he finally lay back, exhausted, Rossi handed him a bottle of water. Hotch took a small amount in his mouth and spat it back into the bag.

"I'm sorry," Hotch said, closing his eyes and wiping away tears, "I hate this."

"Hotch, I know you've been vomiting multiple times, do you have any abdominal pain?"

Reid asked.

"Yes." Aaron kept his eyes closed.

"Ok. I need to palpate your abdomen. It'll take just a moment." As Reid lifted the blanket, he could feel Hotch shaking. Hotch winced as he lifted his shirt.

Reid could see where he'd been kicked and punched. The skin was darkening to a nasty purple shade. He gently placed his fingers on the lower right quadrant. Hotch hissed in pain.

"Ok, let's put the shirt down now." Reid pulled up the blanket, stood and turned to Rossi.

"Can I talk to you?" Reid pulled Dave out of earshot. "This is extremely serious. We need to get him to a hospital ASAP. Abdominal guarding and distention indicates that he's bleeding internally. We have to get him into surgery before he bleeds out."

Rossi felt his stomach drop, "Tell the team what's going on. I'm going to redirect the jet to the nearest hospital."

Spencer turned to face Hotch. All eyes looked to Reid for news. "We're heading to the nearest hospital. You could be bleeding internally." He knelt again in front of Hotch.

Aaron opened his eyes and pressed his arm against his side.

"Are you sure this is necessary?" Hotch groaned, twisting his body to relieve the pain. "What if this is just food poisoning?"

"Hotch, what if it isn't food poisoning?" Reid looked so reasonable. "Also, I haven't seen you eat anything since breakfast. Toast doesn't cause this."

Aaron lay back, feeling strangely calm. His eyes felt heavy and he gave in to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2 Landing

**I'm Fine**

Chapter 2

Landing

Rossi returned from having a word with the copilot. "We're preparing for landing. Seat belts, folks." The team headed to their seats.

Morgan caught Rossi's eye, "How about Hotch? There has to be some way to belt him down." He placed his palm on Hotch's shoulder, "Hey, man, are you with us?"

Aaron sighed. "Yes." He blew out a long breath, "I think I can sit up."

"It's ok. Rossi, hand me that belt, we can strap part of him down in case of turbulence."

Morgan eased Aaron's torso off the couch. Hotch kept his eyes closed and braced his side with his arm. Morgan sat so he could belt himself, and then support Hotch, who was biting his lip trying not to moan.

Rossi managed to clip him in. He handed Morgan an airsick bag. "As much as I'm sure Aaron wants to puke on you for beating him in the football pool, I'll bet you'll be grateful for this just in case." Rossi tried to get a smile out of Hotch, mostly to see how ill his friend was. Morgan gave him a wry glance. Hotch simply looked pathetic. Rossi slipped back to his seat.

The jet tilted as it turned to face the airport. There was a crosswind, which caused the small craft to bump up and down. Hotch felt like this was happening to someone else and he was watching from above, disconnected from his body.

The jet continued to ride the turbulence and Aaron gestured at the bag Morgan held. He wasn't sure if this sudden increase in nausea was from his illness or from being tossed around in the air like a volleyball, but it was a moot point as his stomach clenched again.

Morgan snapped the bag open and held it in front of his boss, "Here we go," he soothed as Hotch dry heaved. The sweat was pouring off him. Morgan wished he had a towel. He patted him on the back, "We're nearly there," he soothed, "You're going to be ok. Nurses dig sick agents. You'll see."

Hotch crumpled the bag in his hand. "Nothing's coming up anymore."

"You're probably too dehydrated." Morgan leaned to grab the water. "Want to try some of this?"

Hotch moaned, "Oh my god, no."

He swallowed the increasing saliva and gasped as he felt a sharp burst of pain in his gut. He tried applying pressure, but the pain was taking his breath away. Hotch writhed and gasped for air, "Something is wrong, Morgan. I'm feeling really strange."

Morgan saw the panic in his friend's eyes. Up to this point, Hotch had been calm and relatively collected for someone who had been violently ill for the last hour. He ducked his head to look out the window. They were nearly on the ground.

"Rossi!" Morgan shouted across the cabin, "Did you request an ambulance? Hotch is getting worse."

Rossi gave up on sitting patiently in his seat. He unbuckled himself and made his way over to Morgan. "What's happening, Aaron?"

"Aaaaaahh," Hotch was trying to keep it together, "It hurts." He gritted his teeth, "there's a stabbing pain."

"I called for an ambulance, one will be waiting for you. You're going to be fine. Hold on, Hotch." Rossi knelt in front of the couch and grasped his friend's hand.

The jet took a sudden lurch, and they were on the ground. As soon as the craft rolled to a stop, they could hear approaching sirens.

Rossi released his friend's hand and started undoing their seat belts. Prentiss and JJ got the door open and waited for the ground crew to wheel the stairs over. The instant the stairs locked into place, they ran down to the EMTs who were standing by.

"We've got an agent with severe abdominal pain and vomiting. I'm not sure he can make it down the stairs though." JJ spoke to one of them.

The EMT nodded, "The stretcher and backboard won't fit. Our best bet is to carry him."

They boarded the plane. "Sir, I'm Ed, and we need to get you down these stairs. Do you think you can walk?"

Hotch nodded and grimaced.

"Ok, Hotch, on three, let's get up. One...two...three!" Morgan hoisted Hotch up off the couch. He found that he could stand, and shuffle doubled over to the door.

Ed started backing down the jet steps, "come on down, slowly. I'll be here to catch in the front. You, Mr. Brawn, get behind him and be ready to grab him."

Morgan agreed and started guiding the bent over Hotch to the door. Walking wasn't so bad. It was the stairs that really hurt. He grabbed the rail with one arm and braced his belly with the other. He heard a voice from behind him.

"Take it slow, Aaron, one at a time." Morgan encouraged him.

After a few steps, he stopped as he began to feel lightheaded, the outer edges of his vision were beginning to turn grey. Morgan grabbed him by the upper chest as his knees buckled. Ed picked up Hotch's legs, and they continued down to the waiting stretcher.

Rossi barreled down the stairs and climbed into the ambulance. The rest of the team collected their bags and stepped into a couple of waiting SUVs that the local PD had provided.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

I have written myself into a corner and now need to find out what to do with poor Hotch. There may be a chapter three...I hope?!


	3. Chapter 3 Hospital

I'm Fine

Chapter 3

The Hospital

The team gathered in the hospital waiting room. The local PD had driven them to the hospital. Morgan turned to Reid, "What do you think is wrong, boy genius? You know the likely causes."

Reid raised his eyebrows, "Well, this is all speculation, and I don't want to cause needless alarm..."

JJ tugged on Reid's arm so he could see Rossi entering the room. Everyone noted his grim expression.

"He is in surgery. We don't know anything yet." Rossi sighed as he sank into a chair.

"Did the doctors give any indication of what to expect?" JJ sat next to Rossi, hoping there would be a crumb of news.

"Not really. They did an abdominal ultrasound, but stopped part way through because all they could see was masses of blood. The docs wanted to open him up, do an exploratory laparotomy." Rossi sighed.

"So they're not sure what's wrong, but they're cutting him open?" Morgan looked incredulous, and angry.

Reid turned to Morgan, "Exploratory surgery is really the best option here, Morgan. If they couldn't see any organs because of bleeding, they need to stop that ASAP. I wouldn't worry about that. I'm guessing he nearly ruptured something in the fight with the unsub, and he managed to keep it together until his intestine or blood vessel or whatever finally gave out. "

"I noticed something was off with him in the lobby of the hotel," Prentiss remarked. "I should have said something. He wasn't feeling well then, and maybe wouldn't have gotten this far if I had brought it up." She felt tears forming and stood to face the window instead of crying openly.

Morgan watched her lean against the window, "Emily, you couldn't have known it would be an emergency just from watching Hotch look a little faint in the lobby. He wasn't even aware of the seriousness of the situation until we were well on our flight. Don't blame yourself."

The team fell into an anxious silence, punctuated by vending machine visits, coffee runs and bathroom breaks. Four hours passed before a tired looking surgeon stepped into the room.

"I'm looking for Aaron Hotchner's family?" She held a clipboard like a shield in front of her body.

The team jumped up in unison, eager to have an update.

"He has been moved to recovery. If all goes well, he'll be in his room in a few hours. His appendix ruptured. We also found several intestinal adhesions and a portion of herniated bowel." She waited as they stood shocked at the information.

"What's the recovery like, doc?" JJ was the first to reclaim her composure. She had a pen and paper in her hands, ready to take down instructions.

The surgeon folded her arms across her chest and launched into her rapid-fire post surgery spiel, "Well, we've got him on a powerful broad spectrum antibiotic to keep peritonitis at bay. The incision healing should be a relative breeze. The most crucial aspect of his recovery will be his digestive tract. How quickly he can leave the hospital will depend on how fast he can tolerate solid food and have bowel movements. It may be more than a week before that is possible. A nurse will come and get one of you once he moves out of post op."

She turned to leave before they could ask any other questions. They all breathed a sigh of relief. It looked like their leader would be fine, even with a lengthy recovery time.

A few hours later, a nurse agreed to bring two of them to Hotch's room. "You can all come, but some of you will have to wait outside and keep the noise down."

Rossi and Prentiss were the first ones in. Hotch still had the nasal cannula supplying oxygen snaking across his face. His color was improving. Prentiss remarked on that right away, "Oh, Hotch. You look miles better. Your face was so gray on the jet. I'm so glad we made this emergency stop." She sat and grasped his hand. Hotch opened his eyes, furrowed his brow and smiled slightly.

"You scared the hell out of us, Hotch." Rossi looked at his friend tearfully.

"What did they find, Dave?" Hotch shifted in his bed without wincing. They were providing excellent painkillers, he thought.

"The surgeon will be back tomorrow morning to check on you. Essentially, that unsub scrambled your guts, and you were dumb enough to get on a plane with a belly bleed. " Rossi smiled at his friend. He was starting to feel more relaxed. Aaron really did look a hundred times better. He was groggy and weak, and far from being well, but he was alive.

"Oh, that was not what the doctor said, Dave. Send in Reid. I want to know when I can get out of here. " Aaron tugged at the cannula and looked down at his legs, which seemed to be inflating. "What the hell is this?"

"I'll go get Reid, JJ and Morgan..." Rossi ducked out of the room. He was feeling relieved that his friend was on the mend and also a little afraid for whoever was going to help Hotch recover.

"Those are leg cuffs that are programmed to inflate at certain times to prevent blood clots. They take them off as soon as you have the go ahead to walk." Emily patted his arm. "You know, Hotch, once you're back at work, you won't be able to sneeze without a whole bunch of overprotective glances from your team."

"Thanks, Emily. I knew I'd be in for it." Hotch gazed at her warily and braced himself for the onslaught of his concerned team.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

TBC? I don't know? Is this worth another chapter? Maybe?

Author's note/drabble:

Thank you for reading, folks! Every time I watch a scene filmed in the BAU jet, I can't help but think that it is a great place for a medical crisis. I have some personal experience with a sudden illness, which guided my portrayal of Hotch. I know it may seem a little strange to not be aware that your body is in some serious trouble, but I can verify that it can happen.

A few years ago, I had an ectopic pregnancy. I felt pretty good. I had pain, that I thought was gas. (High tolerance for pain, yeah!). I powered through the day without thinking much of my symptoms. It wasn't until I was coincidentally at the OB office, that they realized my Fallopian tube had ruptured earlier in the day and I was beginning to go into shock. Even when the doctors and nurses started to look alarmed, I felt calm and free of panic. I was fortunate to have emergency surgery immediately. I'm fine now, thanks to some fast acting doctors. The worst part was recovering in the maternal child unit. A priest asked me how my baby was doing and I wanted to punch him in the face. :-/

Thank you all for giving me an audience.

Concrit is welcome.


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